Asklemmy

I was at a party where this very handsome guy kept making moves and initiating. It felt so nice to be chosen out of many people, and the chats were good rather than superficial small talk. After a while he asked “my place or yours?” No matter how much my mind was aware that I am not the type of person who can carelessly hook up and I get attached, my heart couldn’t say no in the moment. So we went to his and hooked up. We were also drunk which didn’t help. Full disclosure, he couldn’t get completely hard, and I wonder if it has to do with me but he said it’s probably because he’s drunk. We mutually did other intimate things too, and cuddled afterwards which got me - he was giving compliments and being sweet. Then it got weird. I couldn’t sleep and woke him up once after which he turned over and at one point said “get out”. He was in and out of sleep with eyes closed, but it was very clearly said. He also claims that he doesn’t remember anything after he hit the bed. So does that mean it’s possible he was dreaming/sleeptalking and it wasn’t directed at me? I accidentally left something small at his place and he added me on social media later on saying he found it. We sent a few flirty messages back and forth across a few days, and he recently asked about my weekend plans but is now ghosting me for the second time. I just feel old and stupid. I naively thought there could be something this time but they are all the same. I hate that I fell for it and couldn’t control myself. What should I do or say now? We’re in a professional organization (although not a workplace) where word travels fast, my friends all saw us and were so curious, and I really care what our peers think of me. I asked when he was drunk to keep this between us so I’m afraid it didn’t register deeply enough. Should I have a real talk with him, and if so, over food or just a talk in person or over the phone? I feel so lost. Please help me out, friends. Thank you!

Genuinely have a feeling Lots of Kids missed out but I want other peoples opinions

I will avoid saying why I’m planning on doing it now only because it will color people’s interpretation of why I’m doing it. Hopefully my Iran flag will come in time, but it will the a 3’ by 5’ flag and it will tough be 10’ in the air and I will be with other protestors. I have waves the Palestine flag in multiple previous protests and I get the sense that people don’t recognize it like the LGBT flag

For example, in college I got a bad grade on a history exam. The biggest part of why I got a bad grade was mixing up two similar sounding words in an essay question, which I vaguely remembered the professor might have made a big deal about not making that particular mistake in a class one time, but I couldn’t remember the answer to the question if the question was using the word I thought it was, so I chose to write the answer as if the essay question had used the other word (I think it might have been about the British vs French versions of Parliament, something like that). This essay question was one of a set that you were free to choose from, as long as you answered a specified number of questions. Because I was pretty sure my answer to the first question was wrong, later in the exam I came back to this essay section and managed to answer enough other questions that I was one over the number that had actually been requested. I figured if it happened to be right it could only help my grade, so I left it there rather than crossing it out, and left a brief explanation as a footnote, requesting that that answer be discarded if only the specified smaller number of answers could be factored into the score. As it turned out, that answer was marked wrong, and I got a pretty bad grade overall on the exam. The marked exam had no visible points accounting, so I didn’t know how the grade was being calculated. I thought it seemed unfair that my footnote hadn’t been considered, so I went to office hours to ask for a better grade on that basis. I got one, and I was surprised by how much, a full letter grade higher, just for that one question being discounted. This was actually upsetting to me though, I wanted to complain, because that essay section was just one part of a larger exam, and it seemed like that meant that making this one particular word mixup mistake the professor had a pet peeve about gets people marked down a full letter grade, and so you are penalized heavily from following the exam advice everyone gets drilled into them to always prefer putting an uncertain answer to not answering. Also the idea that he was probably just eyeballing the grades and there was no per question points accounting. It just seemed very unfair. But I kept my complaints to myself, since I had already gotten the best outcome I could hope for from that meeting and didn’t want him to change his mind. I wonder if it was worth it though, since these events are now part of a rotation of things I sometimes spontaneously think about and feel a little indignation and imagine things I could have said instead, even though it was years ago and is irrelevant to my life now, and even though I think past me was likely taking grades too seriously. Is that weird? I’d like to hear about it if other people also have little pointless grudges that they can’t let go.

We all have that one feature, the thing that makes you never want to go back to Reddit. Curious to hear what yours is.

As the flotilla is going, I was reflecting how I used to listen to this hip hop album like 10 years ago A lo Cubano from Orishas that was a banger and lots of 'I love Cuba" kinda lyrics — but my spanish is terrible to non-existent, and i don’t know what the state of music is like in 2026. Who is making great free Cuba music these days? What can we be listening to?

I’m mainly talking about anime shows but you can talk about overall all shows if you want to and this will be valid too. I’m looking for answers to the following questions: •What do you use for tracking progress of shows you watch? •What are the pros and cons of how you’re tracking your shows, and is it worth it to be tracking shows this way? (If you’re using a site for tracking, then mention the pros and cons of it with the name of the site) Note: You can include more of your opinion and experience besides the questions’ answers if you want to

Howdy folks, I’m in search of a game cam type set up for monitoring chicken laying habits. Basically a motion activated camera that takes pictures or video when a chicken goes into a nesting box. I’ve done some research, but it’s kind of a SEO shitshow on Google, with 10,000 different options. I want something real simple that just takes an SD card, no wireless network crap. Ideally not crazy expensive. Thanks in advance.

Definition: “gay music video night” is a friendgroup activity wherein you and your friends rotate in choosing music videos to show one another. This often emerges organically as opposed to being planned, and as a subset of a larger hangout, e.g. as a pregame activity or winding down. The reason that it’s called “gay music video night” is that this activity/ritual is often partaken by queer male friendgroups, and for the veneration of their favourite female pop idols (though no music video is excluded here; please share whatever you wish!) Ok now that everyone has been briefed: Chrissy Chlapecka truly continues to gag me. Like her cunt level is just so powerful. She started off with Brat, which was admittedly a studio space and a dream, and still ate down And now she’s putting out incredible videos like Andromeda (which had an insane production turnaround time???) We need to be including her in the conversation. Her strap stays down my throat and her pleaser on my neck, and I thank her. Chrissanie Chlapenotta You Will Always Be Famous 😍😍😍

When I was about 8 years old (2016) I woke up early while my parents were still asleep and turned on the TV to see what to watch. Superjail was on and I cried due to so much gore being on the TV, even if it was cartoon gore. I was 8.

Most of us are familiar with what (your local equivalent of) $10 USD is worth, or $100 or perhaps even $1,000,000. But larger amounts soon become unrelatable. And with the huge wealth inequality at play, it’s easy to come across stories where something worth hundreds of millions was wasted. How much money would it take, under our current systems, to solve various societal problems? (e.g. food shortages, infrastructure fixes, public health efforts, new transport) How much did the achievements of various organizations cost? What could individuals spend such money on? (luxuries, marketing) And make sure to give evidence for your answers!

Yes, this instance is definitely the wrong place to ask, but maybe I’ll be surprised. I hate commercial ads. I consider them intolerable and violating. I’m far from alone in this perspective (see: famous Banksy quote, and subvertising + related cultures). It’s one of the rawest forms of exploitative manipulation. So surely you can understand my confusion whenever I see people just watching ads on their phone until they finish, or even watching ads on television until their show starts again. Come on, just do something else for 4 minutes (most channels run two 4 minute segments per half hour, that why your downloaded TV episodes are 22 minutes each instead of 30) Is there a more meaningful answer than “laziness”?

Not necessarily the best you have received. What compliment could someone else give you that would make you feel best?

Not sure if it’s just me, but I’ve been running into this quite a bit. My client conversations are spread across different messaging platforms, and sometimes important or more detailed discussions just get buried or overlooked. It’s not even about the number of messages, it’s the fragmentation that makes it hard to keep track of everything in one flow. Anyone else dealing with this? How are you keeping track of conversations without things slipping through?

In theory of course. And please refrain from telling me why a global revolution would not work.

i had an idea, what if there was a website that showed companies that are know to be corrupt or engaged in unethical pratices. this could be a hub to easily show people companies they should not support and why.

Red pill ‘alpha’ guys claim wealthy men don’t care about a woman’s background and will date poor women, yet they often mock women seeking rich men. In reality, wealthy men tend to date within their social class. Look at Jeff Bezos, David Beckham, or Leonardo DiCaprio—these men date successful women who are already rich or from wealthy families. Even with large age gaps, the younger partners are still well-off. It seems red pill guys overstate the idea that rich men don’t care about a woman’s status when, in practice, they do.

Nothing against Germans, I’m just wondering why, outside of the English internet, it got such high adoption in Germany compared to eg. France or Spain. I see next to no French/Spanish/etc. content on here in comparison

I know that some of you are going to comment about going to see a doctor before taking such a medication but don’t worry. I will very much go see a doctor before I take it. Now for the main post… I’m in my late 20s but I’m one of those that suffer from early hair loss. Think Patrick Stewart and Jason Statham. I’ve taken Minoxidil before with some results but not that total restoration that I’m looking for. After some thought and hesitation, I’ve decided to take finasteride. I want to know, if you’ve taken finasteride before, what was your experience? I’ve heard that it might give you “down there” troubles. From the little research that I’ve done, it only affects about 2-3% causes if on the standard 1mg dosage. If you haven’t noticed already, I’m a cishet man and (I might be wrong but) most of the replies are probably going to be from other cishet men. However, I also know that many trans women also take finasteride to combat alopecia so, if you’re a trans woman, don’t hesitate to leave a comment about your experience.

My neighbor’s son passed away in April last year and what would have been his son’s 23rd birthday is coming up at the end of the month, so I know the next few weeks are going to be really hard on him. We’re friends, but not super close. I’d like to do something for him, but can’t think of much beyond bringing over food and/or flowers. Any suggestions?

Not simultaneously, just one of each category in how they feel.

Right now it’s Utakotoba by MyGO!!! First time I felt a song that summarizes what’s going through inside me

What happens if the sun shines onto your solar panels, and you have too much power. I guess you could cover the panels with a blanket in such a case, but that would be manual intervention … Do you need to consume all electric power you generate? Ways of wasting power include … heating water or electrostatics. Most people would put surplus power they produce into the grid, but this is connected to government / cooperate regulations and paperwork, some would like to avoid that. An island solution with solar panels is not connected to the power grid at all…

One of mine is potato salad. I always add a good splodge of french dressing Anyone got a secret ingredient for vegetable soup? …mines always a tad bland. good chance to add requests.

When I say normie I mean someone who doesn’t care about self-hosting doesn’t really care that much about privacy and you wouldn’t consider deep tech hobbyist. If you did , how did you do it ? Did they stay ? Or if someone did convert you , how did they do it ?

I mean, crushes that you saw all the time and you were close with, and ones that weren’t good people. My ex-crush, this Polish girl I nickname “Helen” on here, turned out to be a Christian with internalized homophobia and was an ableist asshole who hated special education students and made fun of me behind my back.

I’ll start: I use iOS primarily since iPhones don’t have custom ROMs

I personally think they smell really good, like a lemon lime candy but some people think they smell like cat piss

I meant dropping as in: dropping before completing a whole season. Btw, I’m specifically asking about anime shows but you can say your opinion on overall shows too and this will be valid too.

Are there any invidious clients for android TV that do not have crappy navigation or outright abandoned? I’ve tried clipious and Materialious which both have their own problems. I am using a shield TV for hardware.

I start: I’m mostly left-libertarian I used to be a “normal” libertarian (aka right-libertarian) but I started to realize corporations are probably just as bad as the government, if not a mirror image.

I mean, crushes that you saw all the time and you were close with, and ones that weren’t good people. My ex-crush, this Polish girl I nickname “Helen” on here, turned out to be a Christian with internalized homophobia and was an ableist asshole who hated special education students and made fun of me behind my back.

I made a post yesterday and it racked up a load of upvotes. I happened to go into the community today with a filter for top past 12 hours on, and though my post had more upvotes than the others, it didn’t show there at all. What’s that all about? It’s like I’ve blocked myself or something. Edit: I checked another post in another community with not as many upvotes and it doesn’t show in the top past 12 hours filter either, when it should be top.

Just brainstorming on what I would do with absolute power, and one of the first things i would get to work on (after climate change, eradicating the idea of wealth, and installing global supply lines to freely ship food everywhere) is, what in my mind, the crux of todays issues. As far as i can see, every single issue through every level of our society is caused by or aggravated by the loneliness epidemic (lets discuss that in the comments) As such, ive spent a lot of time studying its effects, causes, and potential solutions. As far as the mens side goes, from personal experiance, I think there are two major issues. The future we were promised, the life our parents had, and even our basic dignities are being stripped away by the declining economic state. Not much the ladies can do about this one. Due to #1, a feeling of “not being good enough” causes us to become reclusive until we feel we have achieved some level of success. That never happens, so that creates mental issues that lead to our problems. Said mental issues include, but are not limited to: decline in ability to socialize. Personally(i am autistic) i feel that humans have a lot of customs that I just dont understand. I didnt “get” kissing until i experianced it, and even then its not really the kissing i enjoy so much as the person wanting to kiss me. I still dont understand sexting or role play. But this is far from limited to sexuality. Ive largely been surrounded by men since my depression hit, and now I get this indescribable anxiety around women that ive never had before. I dont feel that it should hinder me, im used to anxiety and can operate under its influence. But the fact that its noticable is an issue, because its my understanding that people in general are atteacted to confidence. Wouldnt it be nice if I had some sort of social program i could go to to just be around/engage with women? Not to flirt or find partners, but to just reacclimate myself to being around potential partners. I cant train men on how women want to be treated, and I wouldnt even want to tell men how women should be treated seeing as im not a woman. So that leads us into the actual question: would you be willing to take a job where you pretty much just train men on how to act around/ treat women? I’m… hopefully fine enough, not really even looking to date anymore. But I do know a lot of men, and some of them are definitely way worse off than i am. Some of the men are like actual dogs, 0 self control around women. My hypothesis is that no woman has ever overcome their repulsion long enough to explain how they should change their behavior. To be clear, im not blaming women for any of this. Its typically not safe to correct mens behavior. Thats why i think this sort of thing should exist, a place where women can go to actually speak their mind and directly confront problematic behavior in a safe and controlled environment. Things like consent should be thouroughly explained and put into practice. Again, not talking sex. This would be stuff like spending an hour listening to women speak their mind and taking questions, then maybe an hour of dancing lessons. An hour of something similar to speed dating where you swap partners every 15 minutes or so and just talk. Whatever catches your interest. There should probably be some physical contact, humans learn a lot through contact. Again, because every time I bring up stuff like this I get called a pervert and dismissed, I AM NOT TALKING ABOUT SEXUAL CONTACT. This is not “what if your school was softcore porn”. This is literal school, back when they had actual sex education in classes.

I’m usually totally against huge corporations on principle, but there’s definitely one that I can’t criticise and maybe even like, Even though I don’t buy any of their products.

I’m trying to understand the appeal of the Fediverse alternatives, but I’m struggling to see the value. Right now, when I browse Lemmy or PieFed, I feel like I’m seeing 95% the same content I see on the front page of Reddit—memes, politics, and tech news—just with fewer comments and less activity. Meanwhile, the niche communities I actually use Reddit for just don’t exist here, or are ghost towns. I thought the main draw of the Fediverse was the idea of finding a community where you feel like you belong, that fits your interests, but the structure seems to work against that. We have thematic instances, but as soon as you look at the “All” feed, it just flattens everything back into one generic Reddit clone. If you only look at your local instance to avoid that, you’re just isolating yourself, and at that point, you might as well just use a multireddit on Reddit without needing to make a new account. So, what is the actual benefit of using Lemmy or PieFed over Reddit?

I mean, it’s one of those countries in Europe where they allow one to have the right to bear arms yet there are barely the guy entering school starts hurting kids or guy enters (public place) and proceeds to hurt others type incidents happen there while in the USA: amount of times that happens becomes excessive as fuck that it’s an issue and a epidemic at that. The stark difference is that the majority of gun owners in Switzerland are military (active or veterans) & gun fanatics (who have served). Despite being one of the most armed countries in Europe: you do not hear anything equivalent of what happened in Columbine, Orlando, Las Vegas as they’re more disciplined than (cough) American gun owners or users.

Hi! Im looking for book recommendations where the boy likes a girl but shes with someone else and the boy and girl end up together in the end. Thank you!

There’re a number definitions of racism that preclude non-whites from the ability to be racist. Some allow for them to be considered prejudiced. Some are expressed as formulas (priviledge+power or prejutice+power) with the key concept being power. I (relatively uninformedly) refer to these as structural definitions. The question is as the title suggests, and if you’re so inclined, please explain what you think should be made of a resolution in either direction. Is it fine if it is? Should be? Should it not? That sort of thing (and why if you’ve the time). Would honestly prefer supporters of these definitions to respond though all are welcome; i’d be less likely to engage with your response if it reads like a shitpost in either case.

For example, I came across this YouTube video in which the author tests a whole bunch of batteries and displays a series of bar charts showing each battery’s performance in various categories. How do content creators capture and log battery output like that? Is there a specific tool that plugs into a PC or records to a MicroSD card or something?

Imagine your bro gets promoted from VP of somewhere to CEO of a company with a lot of bad press. You grew up with the guy. Think you would take a chance at trying to exert gentle social pressure on him? Probing my underlying thoughts, probably something about social checks and balances preventing violence IDK if good friends have ever slapped it out of business leaders before when there is a market etc. to consider

Newcomb’s problem is a thought experiment where you’re presented with two boxes, and the option to take one or both. One box is transparent and always contains $1000. The second is a mystery box. Before making the choice, a supercomputer (or team of psychologists, etc) predicted whether you would take one box or both. If it predicted you would take both, the mystery box is empty. If it predicted you’d take just the mystery box, then it contains $1,000,000. The predictor rarely makes mistakes. This problem tends to split people 50-50 with each side thinking the answer is obvious. An argument for two-boxing is that, once the prediction has been made, your choice no longer influences the outcome. The mystery box already has whatever it has, so there’s no reason to leave the $1000 sitting there. An argument for one-boxing is that, statistically, one-boxers tend to walk away with more money than two-boxers. It’s unlikely that the computer guessed wrong, so rather than hoping that you can be the rare case where it did, you should assume that whatever you choose is what it predicted.